Group C & D featuring EnGerLand

 

Group C is an interesting group, we have the cosmopolitan Orangemen,” free” Ukraine, Osterreich and the curiosity that is North Macedonia. I have a soft spot for them so that is who we shall begin with.

North Macedonia was actually a part of the state of Yugoslavia which broke apart in 1991. Yugoslavia had qualified for Euro 1992 but as it did not really exist anymore they were replaced by the Vikings who despite getting in through the backdoor so to speak, something you would expect more from the Turks than the Vikings, they went on to remarkably win the tournament.

Why North Macedonia though, well Greece objected to its being called just Macedonia as they claimed that is part of Greece and in 2019, twenty eight years after it gained independence, an agreement was reached adding the North bit and making everybody happy.

From a footballing perspective they are definitely minnows, this is the first tournament they have qualified for under either name. Their star player, Goran Pandev, is thirty seven and they also have “Gjanni” Alioski, who plays for Leeds United and who is universally accepted as being completely mental, and also one of the most annoying players to play against, here he is being head butted by Pepe of Arsenal,

one to watch out for sure. They will finish bottom of this group but will be fun to watch.

Free Ukraine is the name I have given to the remaining part of that country sandwiched between Poland and the hungry Russian Bear who would like to gobble up the remaining parts. Through history, Ukraine has suffered terribly at the hands of the Russian Bear, Stalin starved five million of them in the 1930’s, however, one cannot show too much sympathy for them as they were enthusiastic collaborators with the Nazis in WWII. Their choice of shirt has poked the bear as it shows an outline of the complete Ukrainian borders. As I expect them to finish third in the group, they are probably in direct competition with the bear as to who will have a better record and go through from third place.

Ukrainian shirt showing complete borders that has upset the Bear

Ostertreich, which at least football wise is always in the shadow of their big brother, The Shermans. Although they will deny it today, most Austrians were delighted when the Anschluss took place and they finally became part of the greater Reich, one must never forget that Adolf was an Austrian. An extremely dull and uninspiring team but efficient which should be enough in this relatively lightweight group.

That leaves us with the Orangemen, not those who march through the streets of Belfast every July in their bowler hats, celebrating good king Billy’s victory in the battle of the Boyne, but the original lot whom those Paddys have named themselves after.

The inventors of total football, in the days of Cruyff and Neeskens, are perennial under achievers, with only one Euro and no world cup successes, after appearances in four finals  over all, to show for all their beautiful football. They are technically very gifted but their biggest problem has always been their mental attitude, still, as I said, this is an easy group and the Orangemen should top it with ease.

Group D, there is not much to say about the Czech Republic, when they were the Czechs and the Slovaks they were pretty good, they are not so good now although they do have one or two useful players and to borrow a phrase from cricket will probably not do much to trouble the scorers,

Croatia were world cup runners up in 2018 beating EnGerLand in the semifinal, they are still a good team and will give EnGerLand a run for their money and will qualify for the next stage.

That leaves us with Bonnie Scotland and EnGerLand, this is a rivalry that goes back until the beginnings of time before even the countries existed, when the Northern hills were full of wild tribesmen who had a strange fetish for painting themselves blue (somethings don't change) and liked nothing better than to go South and plunder, pillage and the other thing you do on those days out, the civilized, peaceful hard working Southern tribes.

When the Romans arrived in Britannia, they decided it was just easier to build a wall slightly North of Newcastle from coast to coast to keep the Scots out, than try and civilize them. For fans of game of thrones this may sound familiar.

Once the nations had been formed there was more or less constant strife between the two until the act of Union in 1707 when Scotland was once and for all subjected to rule from London and even then it did not stop them having one more go in 1745 with Bonnie Prince Charlie who was finally defeated at the battle of Culloden in 1746 the last pitched battle ever fought on British soil. 

Even today, there is still a large body of Scots who want independence from the Auld Enemy so this match up carries added significance.

As I have posited elsewhere, one could argue that football has replaced battles and when you watch the clip below, (it is long but try and watch to the end)  you will see that the Scots have had some success for example in 1977 when they conquered Wembley with Ally Macleod Tartan's army. The joy was short lived and by 1978 had turned to tears after the Tartan army returned with their tail between their legs from a disastrous campaign in Argentina, but that is another story.

I was eleven at the time and lived in the neighbourhood next to Wembley, we were used to fans roaming the streets on FA cup final day, but we had never experienced anything like this, my parents did not let me leave the house that afternoon. Pay attention to the attire of the Scottish fans, if you have ever heard of the Bay City Rollers, they have got a lot to answer for.

In footballing terms, Scotland befitting the nation of Macbeth never cease to provide tragedy for their fans and thus enjoyment for opposing fans, because the thing football fans enjoy sometimes even more than their own team’s success is the misery of other fans.

 

The last meeting between the two in the Euros in 1996 was at Wembley and ended with an England victory and this iconic goal from Paul "Gazza" Gascoigne with which I shall leave you. There are so many moments of Scottish history in football but we will have to make do with this.

We will complete the previews with a look at groups E and F on Sunday, enjoy the football until then.