The Miracle of Moscow, reaction and analysis from EnGerLand's latest performance

I start these lines a mere thirty five minutes after EnGerLand managed to do what Steve McQueen could not in the film, The Great Escape, and get away with it. This means that we can delay the postmortem and enjoy for once an improbable England victory.

I along with some of my friends proceeded to do the Conga down the road and hope that we did not disturb the neighbours too much.

Let us remember this is only the last sixteen, I dread to think what will be if  EnGerLand carry on their inexorable march.

That was a blag if ever I saw one. I shall try to remain calm and not let myself get too carried away by the euphoria or slip too much into the vernacular that the non native English reader will not understand.

This roller coaster of a ride was like Dunkirk and the Battle of Britain rolled into one. Henderson was the British army on the beaches trudging back dejectedly all hope extinguished. The Colombian then smashed his shot against the bar, read Ze Shermans not pressing home their advantage and finishing it off there and then. Trippier symbolized by coolly converting his penalty, the little boats coming to rescue the stranded troops as  EnGerLand made it off the beaches to live to fight another day.

Jordan Pickford, the epitome of an Englishman abroad, pasty legs, red faced from two minutes exposure to the sun, added his name to those of the FEW, repelling the Colombian Luftwaffe, to set up Dier to vanquish the Colombians with a low one to the corner.

EnGerLand will be looking to evoke the Churchillian spirit as they move onto to face the root vegetables in the Quarter Finals this coming Saturday afternoon.

Waiting for Dier to take his penalty, the tension was unbearable.

When one thinks of Colombia, a few things come to mind and usually one of the first things is the drug trade. Being an EnGerLand fan would seem to alleviate the need for such artificial means of experiencing the highs and lows which comes from using those substances from Colombia.

As much as I have not wanted to, it is now unavoidable, so these words from the 1970 Thunderclap Newman hit sum up the mood in EnGerLand and wherever their fans gather.

Lock up the streets and houses
Because there's something in the air
We've got to get together sooner or later
Because the revolution's here and you know it's right

To the neutral, if Colombia had not managed that equalizer in the 92nd minute, one could have looked at the game and said it was just as uneventful as the incredibly boring afternoon game between the watch makers and the root vegetables which ended in a dull one nil victory for the vegetables, made possible, as I had alluded to in the preview by a lucky deflected goal.

Colombia came looking for penalties, it was almost if they thought that is the best way to beat EnGerLand as the English record on such occasions was so bad, three failures out of three.

EnGerLand were not much better, they hardly created any chances of note and only went ahead after being awarded their third penalty of the tournament when the Colombian defender Sanchez who I referred to in the preview decided to cadge a piggy back ride on the back of Harry Kane without asking him.

The scenes which then ensued as the Colombian players surrounded the very poor American referee to protest his decision were disgraceful. He will probably need DEA protection as well for the near future.

Mr Sanchez has now given away two penalties and received a red and a yellow card in three games he has played. I would take out a life insurance policy if I was him.

EnGerLand then went inexplicably into their shells and invited the Colombians to play resulting in that injury time equalizer which sent English fans round the world into instant doom and gloom with the almost universal reaction of  here we go again,  EnGerLand just do not have the bottle to deal with pressure situations and then this happened

Cue delirium

which led to scenes like this around the world.

We need to enjoy it while we can as deep down most EnGerLand fans think it will end badly, but in the meantime and as much as I do not want to even contemplate it,, the feeling is It's coming home.

A couple of days off now until the quarter finals begin on Friday